There is a gap between who we are by nature of our existence and who we are by the way we are learned to be. Who we are by the nature of our existence is to be alive at each moment to the best of our life capacity. Embracing the moments with its entirety and not trying to make it perfect. Being at peace with our faults and shortcomings. Accepting our abilities and disabilities by bringing them to their real proportion and not letting them to get out of proportion. Avoiding pain to become catastrophic.
Who we are by our learning is to be all over the place in mind. When we are angry about unpleasant memories and when the unpleasant events continue to bother us every moment of our present life creates a cycle of suffering. We then are never happy at the moment and always worried about what the future will bring. Will it bring on more pain and suffering? Will the catastrophe become a disaster? Will our loved ones still love us? Will any body love us? Will we be able to make ends meet again tomorrow? Who we are is filled with anger, worry and empty from happiness.
This is why there is a gap between who we are and who we are!
Its like an out of focus picture. Unless we bring the two, or many who we are to one, we will never see happiness and peace.